Mistakes
by Meaka
Summary: It's Christmas, and Hermione is spending it alone for the first time ever. Will this be her worst holiday season ever, or will things turn out better than expected?


A/N: Throughout this fic there are lines taken from several songs, (A cookies to anyone who can pick up on what they are!) I do not own any of these songs and I don't own anything that you recognise. I only own the plot.

This started out as a one-shot challenge fic from 

But unfortunately it was a bit too long and I used songs from different years so it wasn't really suitable to send in but oh well, I'll just have to try again XD.

Song titles hidden within this fic are:

**I'll Be Missing You, **Puff Daddy & Faith Evans

**I finally Found Someone, **Barbra Streisand & Bryan Adams

**For you I Will, **Monica

**I miss the way, **Michael W Smith (Adapted slightly for my purposes)

Mistakes 

Hermione sat, curled up on the lounge, holding a pillow to her stomach, watching the rainfall and lightning flash across the dark sky. She sat with most of the lights off and soft music playing in the background. It was Christmas, the first that she would spend without Harry for about 10 years. A tear trickled down her cheek as she thought about him. _'Why did you have to go? I need you in my arms I need to hold you. I miss you so much.''_

Harry sat on the back balcony of his third story apartment, drink in hand and noise from the Christmas party inside floating out.

Ron noticed that his friend had been missing for quite some time; he made his way through all the rooms of their apartment looking for him. He spotted him through one of the windows sitting out on the balcony watching the lightning light up the dark sky. He made his way through the many Weasley's and other close friends that had turned up.

"Everything alright mate?" he asked as he sat down next to him

"Yeah, I'm fine," he said giving Ron a fake half-hearted grin. Ron raised his eyebrows, knowing that there was something wrong.

"Hermione didn't turn up." Said Ron looking around the busy room through the window.

"Really? I hadn't noticed." said Harry half-heartedly, but Ron could see the hurt look on his friend's face at the mention of her name. "She is probably trying to stay as far away from me as possibly. Don't blame her, not after what I did to her." Harry was looking down at his feet as he said this. Ron sighed.

"You coming back inside?" he enquired as he rose from his chair and mover towards the door.

"Nah, I think I'll just sit here for a while." Ron sighed and sat back down.

"As much as I hate to say this, because I know it's going to break Ginny's heart… but … Ginny isn't the one you love, and you know it." Harry sighed,

"But she'll never have me back, not after what I did to her."

"True it would be a bit of a miracle, but, I believe in miracles, and love is a miracle, I miss the old Harry the one that was always happy. I miss the way her love would dance within your eyes, I miss the way her heart would be the soul of your life. I want the old Harry back not the miserable one I see in front of me" He rose and went back inside leaving Harry with his confused thoughts.

There was a knock at the door bringing Hermione back from her thoughts; she put the pillow on the floor next to her at slowly rose to her feet to open the door. She crossed the lounge room of her apartment; she reached the door just as there was another knock.

"I'm coming," she said slightly irritated. She opened the door to find Harry standing there completely soaked through. "Harry! What are you doing here, it's Christmas Eve shouldn't you be with Ginny?"

"Umm… can … can I talk to you?"

"Oh, umm … sure" she said hesitantly "Come in out of the rain, the fires going you should dry off a but." She said as she opened the door and he made his way into the apartment they used to share.

"Thanks" he said as he followed her into the lounge room.

"Is everything aright?" she asked as she settled herself back on the lounge next to the window and watched him peel his drenched coat off and put it in front of the fire to dry. "You're soaking, you must have been out in the rain for ages."

"Umm…. Yeah about an hour actually." He muttered as he sat down. "I've umm… I finally found someone that knocks me off my feet, the one that makes me feel complete. She's funny, she's smart, and she is so kind." He was standing again now and pacing the room, but turned her "I finally found the one to be with every night."

Hermione sat there shocked, she hadn't expected this, for Harry to come raving to her about Ginny, not after what he had done.

"That's … that's great Harry," she said as she struggled to hold back the tears. "I'm pleas … pleased Ginny makes you feel that way." As she said this she rose from her chair. "I think you should go now, I'm meant to be meeting someone and I need to get ready." Tears were now threatening to overflow onto her cheeks but Harry didn't move.

"Hermione ... Hermione I … It's not Ginny that makes me feel like this" he blurted out suddenly, making Hermione stop dead in her tracks. She turned around looking daggers at him.

"What are you saying Harry? If you don't love her, you don't love me, then who? Have you been cheating on her?" she screamed at him, making him recoil slightly.

"Mione –"

"Don't ca -" Harry placed a hand over her mouth.

"Please just let me finish okay, this is hard enough as it is" he took his hand slowly away from her mouth; she glared at him for a minute before sitting back down.

"Ever since I started going out with Ginny I've been miserable, I'm surprised she hasn't picked up on it actually, I soon realised that I had made the wrong decision, and I wish I could turn back the hands of time. I love you Hermione. Words can't express what you mean to me. I know it's probably going to take a miracle for you to forgive me, but I believe in miracles, and love is a miracle. I will cross the ocean for you, I will go and bring you the moon, I will be your hero, your strength, anything you need. For you I will, lay my life on the line, for you I will fight. For you I will die" Hermione sat there shocked, wanting to believe him but not trusting him at the same time.

"What… what about Ginny?" she asked finally. Harry sighed.

"I don't love her, and I don't think I ever did. I don't know what it was, it was stupid and it was the biggest mistake I have ever made." Harry walked over to where she was sitting; he kneeled down in front of her and placed a hand on her chin. He gently pulled her head up slightly so that she was looking straight into his emerald green eyes. "You mean the world to me Hermione, I never meant to hurt you, and I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for what I have done to you, but I cant live without you, for me you are everything that is right with the world, without that I have nothing to live for."

"You can't just expect me to get over what you did so quickly Harry. You really hurt me! I don't know if I can forgive so easily," whispered Hermione, a tear falling down her cheek. Harry gently wiped it away with his thumb, while resisting the temptation to kiss her.

"Think about it okay?" he whispered, as he looked deep into her tear filled brown eyes. "But just know this, no matter what you decide Ginny and I are over, and I will always love you." He kissed her softly on the forehead as he stood up, he walked slowly over to where his jacket was lying beside the fire, he picked it up and waled over to the door not saying a word. He stopped at the door; hand on the knob readying to turn it. He turned around so that he could see her.

"I am so sorry for what I did Mione, I never meant to hurt you." A few seconds later Hermione heard the door click shut behind him. She sat there in shock, not knowing what do to. There were so many things going through her head. But one thing was clear. She jumped up off the lounge tears streaming down her cheeks. She raced across the room and bolted through the door. She looked left and right and just saw him disappear around the corner.

"Harry wait!" she yelled, but he didn't hear her over the rain. She ran as hard as she could, knowing that she wouldn't get another chance to tell him.

"She raced around the corner and ran straight into him, as he leant against the wall, head bowed against the rain. Hermione was knocked to the ground by the impact. She lay there panting for a second before Harry realised what had happened and was kneeling down next to her on the wet pavement.

"Hermione! Are you alright?" he asked desperately, as he helped her to her feet. Hermione stood there in front of him with his hands on her shoulders, hot tears mingling with cold drops of rain on her face. After a minute of looking into Harry's concerned face, she wrapped him in a tight hug, never wanting to let got.

"I love you to Harry. I always have and I always will." Said Hermione into his jacket, so that Harry could only hear a muffled version. "Please don't ever leave me again" she whispered into his ear as she lifted her head up.

"Never Hermione, I meant everything I said in there. Without you I have nothing to live for. I realise that now. Hermione loosened her grip slightly and pulled away just enough to look into his emerald green eyes. The only thing she could see was love, love for her. Harry leant down and kissed her softly, a kiss that was full of love and longing. She knew that he wasn't lying; she knew that he would never leave her again.

-- The End --

A/N: well I'm kinda disappointed now that that is finished ( hmm…. Time for another fic me thinks. To all those reading my other Fic "Affairs of the Heart" don't worry it is still being written I just needed to get this one written first but hey it only took me 3 – 4 hours so it didn't take much time away from it and I will be updating soon! I promise! Well for everyone who got to the end of that little not, here have a cookie. ::hands out cookies::

I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I did writing it. Please R&R


End file.
